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Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

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A Faire Amount Of Context Missing

| Allentown, PA, USA | Bizarre, Language & Words, Pets & Animals

(I’m back at work after a day off to attend the regional Renaissance faire, of which I’m a passionate devotee. I’m showing the pictures on my phone to a coworker, and offering as little context as possible for what I’m saying just to be funny.)

Me: “…and here’s Snorkel the dancing stunt pig, with his human daddy.”

Customer: *passing by and doubling back* “Wow, that is the greatest sentence I’ve ever accidentally overheard in my entire life.”

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Not Even Remotely Close To Finding It

| TX, USA | Bizarre

(I work in the customer service department at a grocery store and get a call.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I think I left something there the other day and was hoping you’d found it.”

Me: “All right, what was the item, ma’am?”

Caller: “A DVD remote.”

(I’m surprised at this, since we almost only sell food.)

Me: “I’m sorry. What?”

Caller: “A DVD remote. I always carry it with me for personal reasons.”

Me: “I’m sorry… but we haven’t had any remotes turned in.”

Caller: “Okay, just figured I’d check. Will you call me if it turns up?”

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Not The Brightest Lantern In The Box

| Rochester, NY, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

(The restaurant where I work has oil lanterns on each table, and they are lit everyday at four pm before we lower the lights for atmosphere. I am lighting all the lanterns. I approach a table and launch into my standard explanation.)

Me: “Hi there. Excuse me, I’m just going to lean in here and light the lantern real quick.”

Customer: “Is that in your job description?”

Me: *confused* “Um, yes.”

Customer: “Oh, okay.”

Me: *trying to make a joke* “I don’t just go around randomly lighting lanterns!”

Customer: “REALLY?!”

(The customer seemed to think I was only lighting the lanterns because I felt like it. I have no idea why!)