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Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

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Happiness Is All In The Wrist

| CA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(The customers have just asked me to write on a cake. They are a woman, Customer #1, and a man, Customer #2. After I have written on it, Customer #1 is looking at my handiwork.)

Customer #1: “Oh, wow, you have nice handwriting.”

Me: “Thank you very much.”

Customer #1: “Very steady, and good wrist work. You must make your boyfriend very happy.”

Customer #2: *obviously very shocked, he sputters and tries to say something like “you can’t say that!”*

Me: “Actually…” *holds up my left hand and points to my ring* “Wedding ring.”

Customer #1: “There, see? You made him very happy.”

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The Gift Of Death

| TX, USA | Bizarre

(I work at the service desk of a home improvement store. I’ve had a line of customers wanting to do returns and purchases. An older man walks up to my register.)

Customer: “I need a gift card.”

Me: “Okay, I can do that for you. Unfortunately the only two I have down here say ‘THANKS’ on them. Is that okay?”

Customer: “It’s for a funeral.”

Me: “…Oh. Uhm, well we have a much larger variety down at the regular registers.”

Customer: “You mean I have to go all the way down there after I’ve been waiting here for ten minutes?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I only have these two gift cards down here, and they both say ‘THANKS.’”

(He huffed and walked away. I told a few coworkers and none of us could figure out why you would give a gift card for a home improvement place at a funeral.)

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What A Sweet Old Bag

, | UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(During the night shift at the restaurant I work at, a customer pulls up.)

Customer: “I’ll get a cheeseburger, a small [Soda], and some chips, please.”

Me: “Okay, will that be all for today?”

Customer: *deadpan* “Well, could you dip the bag in chocolate? Can you do that?”

(I laugh, because the customer made a direct quote from comedian Tim Hawkins who has a joke about how people never eat healthily at fast food places.)

Me: “I see that you watch Tim Hawkins!”

(There is an awkward silence on the other end of the phone.)

Customer: “Uh… who’s Tim Hawkins?”

Me: “Never mind.”

Customer: “But can you dip the bag in chocolate?”

Me: “No, sir, we can’t.”

(To this day I have no idea whether it was an actual, insane request, or if somebody with a sense of humor decided to mess with my mind.)