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Category: Bad Behavior

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Not Really Buttering You Up For Good Service

| Fair Oaks, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Popular

(I am taking an order from a table of four whom I have waited on only once before. Every single person at the table is allergic to at least one thing.)

Me: “For you, sir?”

Customer: “I’ll have the crispy salmon, but I just want it grilled.”

Me: “Crispy salmon, not crispy?”

Customer: “Yes, but listen, I can’t have ANY BUTTER. Have the chef grill it in olive oil, lemon juice, and capers.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll let him know.”

Customer: “Listen, instead of the mashed potatoes, I want a baked potato, with all of the fixings on the side except sour cream. I can’t have ANY SOUR CREAM.”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “Also, instead of the carrots, I want extra asparagus, but make sure they grill it in olive oil, maybe a little lemon juice if they want, because I can’t have ANY BUTTER.”

Me: “No problem. I’m sorry, just to clarify, you said you wanted the salmon grilled with olive oil, lemon juice, and what else?”

Customer: “Capers. Capers. You should seriously have this down by now. I order this every week. I guess you do need to go to school for this job.”

(I go to the kitchen and tell the chef.)

Chef: “Did you tell him we don’t carry butter?”

Me: “Yeah… I told him last week, too.”

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Doesn’t Know The Tip Of Scriptural Meaning

| Bad Behavior, Money, Popular, Religion

(I am a waitress at a restaurant. I’ve served a table and they are done with their meal but are just sitting and talking so I collect their empty dishes. When I do I discover that they’ve half hidden one of those fake $10 bills with John 3:16 written on it. I’m normally a pretty professional person, but I can’t help but speak up.)

Me: “Did you mean to leave this as a tip?”

Customer #1: “Yes. If you just accept Jesus Christ into your heart his love will be worth much more than any tip I could give you.”

Me: *pulls out cross necklace that I usually wear under my uniform* “Sir, I’m 32 years old and I’ve been a Christian since I was 17. I attend church twice a week unless I’m scheduled to work, and the God I know would tell me to lead by example. If you don’t want to tip your waitresses, fine, that’s your right, but please do not insult them or God by using Him as an excuse for it.”

(I tossed the “tip” back at him and take the dishes back to the kitchen leaving him dumbfounded. My manager intercepts me on my way back out to the dining room to check on my other tables.)

Manager: “Please go wait in the break room. I need to talk to you.”

(I do as he asks and I spend the next 10 minutes concerned that I am going to get written up or even fired.)

Manager: *walking into the break room* “So, I was going to write you up, but when I went out to talk to the table, three other tables informed me that if I fired you they were never coming back. I’m not going to write you up, but you really can’t do that. So why don’t you go home early today and come back tomorrow when you’re less aggravated?”

(I got my stuff and while I was on my way out I run into a customer that was sitting nearby in another waiter’s section.)

Customer #2: “Oh, no, you didn’t get fired, did you?”

Me: “No, I didn’t get fired. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

Customer #2: “I’m glad. I hope this cheers you up.” *she writes something on the back of her receipt and hands it to me.*

(When I got home I looked up the bible verse she suggested, Proverbs 11:24-25: “One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.)

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That Last Part Is The Icing On The Pancake

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(It’s Sunday morning, during our breakfast menu.)

Me: *hearing the door open* “Good morning!”

Customer: “Do you guys have any platters where I can just get sausage and eggs?”

Me: *searching through the options on the screen* “Hey, [Coworker], do we have platters without pancakes?”

Coworker: “No, I don’t think so. Why?”

Me: “He wants to get just eggs and sausage on a platter.”

Coworker: “We can ring him up just the sides.”

Customer: “How much would that be?”

Me: *ringing up the eggs and sausage* “It’s gonna be about $5. Did you want to try the ultimate?”

Customer: “What does it come with?”

Me: “It has the eggs, sausage, we’ll replace the pancakes with another side of sausage. And you get a side of hashbrowns with it.”

Customer: “Bacon.”

Me: “Not the sausage?”

Customer: “No, just bacon. How much?”

(I cash out the customer while my coworker shouts the order back to kitchen, repeating it several times so that kitchen can actually understand it. She tells them it’s with the pancakes; I correct them that that’s being replaced with the bacon. This entire time, the customer is still right next to me, and can hear everything the two of us have said. When it comes out, half of the tray is covered with bacon, while the rest is with scrambled eggs.)

Customer: *interrupting me while I’m bagging the order* “What’s in that platter?”

Me: “It’s just the bacon and eggs, like you wanted.”

Customer: “No, you charged me for the ultimate. You charged me for the pancakes. Give me them.”

Me: “We replaced the pancakes with the bacon like you wanted.”

Customer: “You charged me for pancakes. Give me my pancakes.”

Me: “All right, just a moment, please.” *starts walking away*

Customer: “No ‘just a moment.’ Give it now!”

Me: “I need to get my manager.”

(I quickly explain the situation to the manager on shift, explaining that we gave him what he wanted and was charged for.)

Manager: *after about a minute, to the kitchen* “I need some pancakes, please!”

(At this point, I’ve holed myself at the specialty drink station, doing the morning prep.)

Me: *to Coworker* “Please give me something to justify my staying here until he leaves…”