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Category: Bad Behavior

When Alcoholism Is Contagious

| NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Spouses & Partners

(My father is moving boxes of ceiling tiles. My dad lifts one up and hits me square in the nose, breaking it. After we check in at the hospital and I get seated at a bed, we witness an older man roll in on a stretcher and begin to talk to his nurse, obviously intoxicated.)

Nurse: “Hi, how are you doing today? My name is [Nurse] and I will be your nurse.”

Man: “Well, I’m doing fine; I just have no idea how I got here.”

Nurse: “It says here you collapsed unconscious. Did you drink any alcohol today?”

Man: “Yes. Yes, I did.”

Nurse: “And how much did you drink?”

Man: “Around two cups of vodka.”

Nurse: “That’s a lot.”

Man: “Yeah, but if you met my wife, you’d know it’s not enough.”

Nurse: *chuckles*

Man: “That’s the best thing about hospitals, you can say whatever you want and no one judges you because you’re sick.”

Nurse: “All right, Mr. Wise-Guy, I need to take your blood pressure.”

Man: “I like you. What is your name again?”

Nurse: “Thank you, it’s [Nurse].”

Man: “Yeah, you have nice tits. I’ll call you [Nurse] with the big tits.” *laughs*

Nurse: “…”

Dad: *under his breath* “If we are going to be here any longer, I’ll need a drink myself…”

These Adult Toys Are Extra Dirty

| USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

(I work in an adult novelty store that sells toys. A lady walks in and comes up to the counter and pulls out a very expensive item.)

Customer: “I bought this here and I need to return it and get my money back.”

Me: “All novelty sales are final, due to the intimate nature of the products. That’s the law in this state.”

Customer: “But it’s still in the package!”

Me: “Yeah, but these kinds of products come in easily opened packages, they’re not actually sealed.”

(I take a closer look at the package, and it’s not even an item we carry. I’ve been with the company for almost ten years, and I’m the one that orders all of our stock. The item retails for almost $130, and would never sell in our market.)

Me: “Besides, ma’am, we don’t carry that product. I’m 100% certain of that. So that didn’t come from here.”

Customer: “It was worth trying. So, how much is this worth? I found it outside of someone’s house on the curb. Think I could sell it on eBay?”

Me: *at a complete loss for words as this is beyond disgusting* “I don’t know, but the retail on it is $130.”

Customer: “Thanks for your help!”

Paying It Forwards, Going Backwards

Baton Rouge, LA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

(I’m a customer in a restaurant. A woman has just asked for her bill only to be told it was already paid by someone else.)

Customer: “What do you mean it’s been paid? By who?”

Waiter: “I’m sorry, they asked to be kept anonymous.”

Customer: “WHO PAID MY BILL?”

Waiter: “Someone else paid your bill, ma’am. I don’t know their name.”

Customer: “Get your manager.”

(The owner happens by, showing another couple to their table.)

Owner: “Yes, how can I help you?”

Customer: “This guy won’t give me my bill. He said it’s been paid for already. Someone else paid my bill.”

Owner: “It happens sometimes. I guess they wanted to be nice. Have a nice day!”

Customer: “No. I want to know who paid it!”

(She proceeds to go to every table and ask the customers there if they were the ones who paid her bill. Eventually she was thrown out of the restaurant for causing a scene. I guess some people just can’t be grateful!)