Category: Bad Behavior


Not A People Person

| CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(A regular customer we’ve nicknamed “her royal highness” waves me over.)

Me: “Yes, can I help you?”

Highness: “One of you was supposed to bring me a yogurt!”

Me: “Okay, which one of us was it?”

Highness: “I don’t know! I don’t pay attention to you people! They’re barely even people to me!”


Won’t Accept Your Olive Branch

| TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I’m working in a pizza shop, and an irate customer has just brought his pizza back up to the counter to my coworker.)

Customer: “I ordered this pizza WITHOUT mushrooms, and it is completely covered in mushrooms!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, sir. I’m very certain that pizza has no mushrooms on it. It contains all the meats, onions, black olives, and cheese.”

Customer: “And I’m telling you I see mushrooms all over it.” *lifts up cheese and displays a black olive* “See? Right HERE!”

Coworker: “Sir, that is a black olive.”

Customer: “I know what a god-d*** f****** mushroom looks like, so don’t tell me that!”

Coworker: “Very well, sir, I’ll remake the pizza and give you free drink refills while you wait.”

Customer: “Just hurry up, then!”

(I remade the pizza, once again without mushrooms. Customer receives his pizza and starts the same dialogue again. Since this was before smart phones or even the Internet, it was not possible to bring up a picture of an actual mushroom to show the customer what an idiot he was being.)


Closing Time Came Earlier For You

| Solihull, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Popular, Time

(I am on the shop floor with my mum, who has come to meet me on my lunch break. Due to a combination of the hot weather and having skipped breakfast, out of nowhere I faint. My mum puts me in the recovery position and some of my colleagues start to come over to see if I’m OK. Amidst the commotion, a customer comes over, sees my uniform, and bends over to where I am LYING ON THE FLOOR.)

Customer: “Excuse me, what time do you close today?”

Me: *too woozy and shocked to think of another response* “4:30.”

(The customer walked off without even a thank you.)


Only Have Yourself To Name

| Manila, Philippines | Bad Behavior, Funny Names, Language & Words, Popular

(I work as a customer service representative for an American credit card company. Most of our callers are irate since I’m assigned in the billing inquiry department. A call comes in and the client’s account automatically pops up and as part of our security procedure, the caller’s name should be captured over the recorded line. After my opening spiel, I ask for the caller’s name.)

Me: “For added security, may I please have your full name?”

Caller: *sounds frustrated and sarcastic* “It’s [Full Name], b****!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Caller: “I said, it’s [Full Name], b****!”

Me: “Oh. So, how can I help you today then, Ms. B****?”


Me: “Oh. I’m sorry. I was asking for your name. You said your name is [Full Name] B****. I thought it’s your last name.”

Caller: “Transfer me to your manager now!”

Me: “With pleasure!”


Don’t Gamble Your Job On It

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Bad Behavior, Popular

(Two seconds before I call no more bets, customers thrusts $10 at me.)

Customer: “Put it on 47!”

Me: “Sir, put it down on the table; I can’t take it from your hand.”

Customer: “I said 47!”

(Unwilling to risk my job for this rude customer and with the wheel coming to a halt I call no more bets.)

Customer: “If that lands on 47, I’ll…”

(The wheel stops on 3:1 and I pay out winning bets. I then declare new game.)

Customer: “If 47 came up you would be in so much trouble.”

Me: “Look, sir, if you want me to place your bet put it on the table. I cannot take anything from you directly. Secondly, if your bet isn’t on that’s your responsibility. Call bets is not an obligation.”

Customer: “I can’t reach. What do you want me to do? I haven’t got Go-Go-Gadget arms. I pay your wage. You should do whatever I tell you to!”

(Customer cusses me out and threatens to “cave my head in.”)

Me: *sigh* “I just explained it to you. And if you truly believe that, then you must really suffer from confidence issues. Threaten me again and I will have you detained. I am refusing you service. I suggest you take your small-man syndrome somewhere else.”

(Thank god we don’t work on tips in Australia.)

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