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Category: Bad Behavior

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What Plays Around Comes Around

| Clayton, NC, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I work as a cashier at a gas station. It is a small store and not very busy with only one register. Luckily, this is the most relaxed manager I’ve ever had; I am allowed to be my blunt self. After cashiering for several years, I am so sick of the little “jokes” that customers say and do. (Like, “Oh, no price tag. That means it’s free!” A customer is purchasing a pack of cigarettes and a candy bar. He looks to be in his 40s or 50s.)

Me: “That’ll be [Total].” *I reach to take the bill from his hand.*

Customer: *pulls the money back*

(I set both hands down on the counter and stare at him as he smiles, thinking this is a fun thing to do. He holds the money closer to me again and I hold my hand out for him to place it in.)

Me: “I work until 3:30, so I’ve got all day. It won’t bother me a bit if you don’t get your smokes and chocolate.”

Customer: “You don’t play around, do you?”

Me: “Nope. At least two people a day try that.”

Customer: “Fair enough.”

(He handed me the cash and I finished the sale. I guess we were close to his house or job because I started seeing him on my shift fairly frequently and he eventually became one of the customers I shared friendly banter with, so no hard feelings. The same stupid jokes all day every day gets really tiring, so please try to avoid them!)

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No Point Crying Over Spoiled Milk

| Fort Pierce, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I’m standing in line to get a few essentials at a chain drug store that I frequently shop at. On this day, there is a new cashier. This exchange happens with the customer in front of me.)

Customer: “I’m returning this! Your f****** store sold me bad milk! I want my money back, NOW!”

Cashier: “I’m sorry about that ma’am… Um, can you hold for just a second so I can get my manager? I’m still new and don’t—”

Customer: “I don’t give a s*** and I am NOT waiting any longer! Give me my money NOW!”

(By this time the manager has come up, no doubt drawn by this woman’s shrieking.)

Manager: “What seems to be the—”

Customer: “Your d*** idiot cashier won’t do my refund! You gave me bad milk and I want my money back!”

Manager: “I’m very sorry about that, ma’am. She’s new and doesn’t know how to do a refund yet. But if you show me your receipt, I’d be happy to help.”

Customer: “I don’t have my f****** receipt! You sold me bad milk!”

Manager: “Well, ma’am, I need to be able to look up the purchase. Do you have a loyalty card you used? Or if you used a credit card I can look it up—”

Customer: “H***, no, I don’t have your d*** card! I paid cash, so give me my cash!”

Manager: “Ma’am, I’m sorry but that isn’t—”

Customer: “You’re all just trying to f****** rip me off! You sold me bad milk; my kids could have gotten sick! I never get good service!”

(She continues to scream at them both while demanding her refund. I’ve finally had enough.)

Me: “Hey! IDIOT! If you would shut the f*** up for two seconds, you would probably have been able to get a store credit at the least, but you stood here and shouted at these two girls for doing their job!”

Customer: “Shut up, you stupid b****! It’s not your concern!”

Me: “It is when you are holding me up! You’re being unreasonably rude. And before you claim they sold you ‘bad milk’ read your d*** expiration date!”

(The milk’s label said the sell by date was in fact today.)

Me: “Yeah, so, no, they didn’t. You bought milk and it went bad. Stop abusing them and get the h*** out of here, or I will dump that ENTIRE gallon on your head!”

(The customer stammers and huffs before bolting out of there, leaving the spoiled milk.)

Manager: “[Cashier], let me introduce you to [My Name]; she’s a regular here.”

Me: “You did fine, sweetie. Can I get two packages of [Nicotine Lozenges] and this pizza, please?”

(I work retail, too, and I can’t defend myself at my store. But I do love telling people off other places.)

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You Don’t Know Jack About Jackelopes

| Denver, CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals

(The restaurant where I work is western-themed and a popular stop for tourists. I’m ringing a couple out at the on-site gift shop when the lady spots our stuffed Jackelope head mounted above the door.)

Lady: “Is that real?”

Man: “Of course it’s real. Look at it.” *he catches my eye and winks*

Me: *playing along* “Yeah, actually, [Founder] caught this guy out in the south field in the sixties.”

Lady: “Wow! You know I’m from [State] and we don’t have them there. I thought they were a myth!”

Man: “Probably because they look like regular rabbits from a distance, right?”

Me: “Yep. Right up until fall when the Jacks’ horns really come in. The does are harder to spot pretty much year round. Last year, I think, we had a four-prong Jack spotted on the property.”

Lady: “I guess you learn something new every day!” *she snaps a picture with her phone and begins to walk away* “I’m going to have to tell [Friend] that she was wrong…”

Me: *quietly to the man as he turns to follow her* “She’s going to kill you.”

Man: “Worth it.”

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Me No Speak Estupido

| San Diego, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Language & Words

Me: “Good morning, [Company]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, [My Name]. How are you?”

Me: “I’m well, and yourself?”

Customer: “Oh, my god, and you speak English properly! I’m doing amazing, thank you!”

Me: “…”

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Crinkle Brain

| USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(My coworker and I teach art classes at a craft store. We are getting ready for a class when a customer pokes her head in the door and politely asks for help, acknowledging that we are busy. We of course say, “sure!” She is holding a packet of the crinkle stuff that is often used in Easter baskets or gift bags; picture something like confetti, but in long strips instead of little pieces.)

Customer: “Do you know how long each strip is?”

(I don’t know why customers think we have this information memorized. Well, it is in a bag all smushed up, so it’s hard to tell.)

Me: “We can open up the package and look.” *knowing that the package had a sticky closure that would seal right back up in case she didn’t want to buy it*

(I open it up and show her, then seal it again and hand it back to her. While I am doing that, she keeps asking very specific, weird questions that are either simple or impossible to answer, like asking if she can cut the strips smaller and how long that will take. It’s made of paper, so it is fairly self explanatory, I would think…. Then she says:)

Customer: “Thanks. But I do need one more thing from you. Show me where I got this from? I don’t remember.”

(Even though it is all the way across the store and we are busy with our class stuff, we agree. My coworker goes to show the lady and comes back fuming.)

Coworker: “That lady was f***** crazy!”

Me: “What did she do?”

Coworker: “The only reason she asked me to show her where that was is so she could get a new package because she didn’t want to buy the one you opened!”

Me: “Seriously?!”

Coworker: “Yeah, and she’s just going to take it home and rip it open anyway!”

(Mind you, I sealed it up almost perfectly to where you could barely tell it had been opened. And it was sealed completely so the item wasn’t in danger of falling out. I can understand if it was a gift or something, but it definitely wasn’t.)

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