Category: Bad Behavior

Registration Disassociation

| Canada | Bad Behavior, Technology

(I answer a call.)

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] speaking. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I need to activate this software I bought. Quickly now, I’ve already been on the line for too long!”

Me: “All right, ma’am, in that case, the system needs the registration number.”

Customer: “Why? Can’t you just see it on your screen and press the button?”

Me: “I apologize for the inconvenience, but I really need that registration number. Otherwise the system won’t let me in to activate the software.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t know how to find it!”

Me: “It’s not an issue, ma’am, I can guide you. Please go into the Settings menu. Once there, you go into the section About, and finally you click on Registration Number to display the 12-digit number the system needs.”

Customer: “That’s too difficult!”

Me: “Once again, I apologize for the inconvenience, ma’am. I’ll go more slowly. First, please go into the Settings menu. Please let me know when you have and I will move along.”

Customer: “Yeah, yeah, I know!”

Me: “Then, ma’am, please find the section titled About…”

Customer: “Hmm hmm.”

Me: “…then finally click on Registration Number to display the 12-digit number the system needs. Could you please read me that number?”

Customer: “I don’t have it!”

Me: “Ma’am, are you sure you are following the steps exactly?”

Customer: “I haven’t done any of that! Why should I do all the work?! Just activate the d*** thing already!”

Me: “I’d be happy to, but to do that I need the registration number!”

Customer: “You’re just a lazy idiot! Get me someone on the line who knows what they are doing!”

Me: “Just to confirm, you’d like for a supervisor to handle your file?”

Customer: “Get one on the line, child!”

Me: “Your request to have a supervisor handles your case has been logged as per our process. I will therefore disconnect this call and a supervisor will get back to you within a business week. Good bye, ma’am.”

Customer: “WHAT D—”

Me: *hangs up*

You Toy With Me I’ll Toy With You

| NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Rude & Risque

(I answer the phone. The caller is male; I am female.)

Me: “[Grocery], how may I help you?”

Caller: “Your hold music is awesome.”

Me: “Thanks… What can I help you with today?”

Caller: “Do you sell…” *giggles* “…sex toys?”

Me: “No, we do not.”

Caller: *still giggling* “Oh, well, my girlf—” *I disconnect the call*

(Later, when I’m relaying the story to a coworker…)

Me: “I should have said ‘no, you’ll have to find another way to go f*** yourself.'”

Heavy Drinking Is Not In His Jeans

| UK | Bad Behavior, Transportation

(My friend gets on a train to somewhere in London one evening, while a bit drunk. He doesn’t remember what happens next. The next day, he’s woken up by a ticket attendant. Note that there are several families on the train by this time, including young children.)

Friend: “Where am I?”

Attendant: “You’re in Bognor Regis, sir. And it’s ten in the morning.”

Friend: “Sorry, I must have fallen asleep. Would it be okay if I stayed on the train?”

Attendant: *casually* “You’re welcome to do so. Just as long as you put your jeans back on.”

Ignorant Of Your Ignoring

| Louisville, KY, USA | Bad Behavior

(Part of my job involves greeting customers and touching back with them to make sure they’re able to find what they were looking for. I also have to ask them about opening store charge card which is as awkward for me as it is for them. Most of the customers are polite and good-natured about it.)

Me: “Oh, good afternoon, ma’am! What brings you in today?”

(The customer is already walking in the other direction. This happens sometimes since sometimes my voice can be kind of soft, especially when we have several customers coming in over a short period of time, so I just assume she didn’t hear me and think nothing of it. Later, I find her browsing in my zone while I’m touching back with customers.)

Me: “Hi, ma’am, are you finding everything all right?”

Customer: “Hm.”

Me: “Will you be shopping with our store charge—”

Customer: “I don’t like this kind of service. I thought I made that clear when I ignored you at the door!”

(I’m so stunned that I can’t say anything as she walks out the door. I turn to see one of my coworkers and another customer staring after her in surprise.)

Coworker: “Woah.”

Customer: “But… you were just doing your job, weren’t you?”

The Wheel Always Comes Back Around

| Charleston, SC, USA | Bad Behavior, Transportation

(I’ve been a bicycle mechanic for over 10 years and have heard my share of JRAs (I was Just Riding Along when my frame broke in two… etc), but this customer stands out for some reason. He enters the service door with a bike he has purchased from us, clearly agitated.)

Me: “Yes, sir, how can we help you?”

Customer: *mumble* “Warranty work…” *mumbles* “…shoddy workmanship…”

(He kind of mumbles this under his breath as he keeps striding up to the service area, and then actually pushes the bike into me, physically. It doesn’t hurt, but it’s pretty aggressive.)

Me: “I’m sorry; you’re having an issue with the bike? What’s going on?”

Customer: *grunts and points toward the rear wheel*

(I kneel down and notice that both the brake arm and the housing for the three-speed hub are disconnected, meaning the bike cannot shift or brake. These are the two things you would need to unfasten to remove the rear wheel, by the way.)

Customer: *scowling and standing over me as I kneel* “You ever hear of Loctite?”

Me: “Yes, sir, I have heard of Loctite.”

Customer: “Well, maybe you should USE some.”

Me: *incredulous* “Sir, I’ve been doing this for 10 years. This is my job. The brake arm already uses a nylock nut. Anyway, it looks like the shift pin’s fallen out, too. Let me see if I have a spare.”

(This gives me a chance to go in the back and look for the part, and for him to get out of my face and cool down. Since I was 99% sure this was a case of him (or someone else) removing the rear wheel and then being unable to reinstall it, I thought I’d offer him some tips.)

Me: *wheeling the bike out of the service area* “Well, I got it all hooked back up. Thank goodness I did have one of those pins.”

Customer: *silent, pensive, already looking a bit sheepish*

Me: “It’s the darndest thing, really, for both that housing bolt and the brake arm to have loosened up at the same time, but they’re both up to proper torque now. I can’t imagine that happening again. If for some crazy reason that housing does loosen up, or if you’re removing the wheel, take care not to lose or bend that shift pin though. Anyway, I’m sorry you had to deal with this, but of course that’s why we offer a warranty on all new bikes for the first year. If there’s anything else you need or if something goes out of adjustment, don’t hesitate to bring it back.”

Customer: *mumbled thanks*

Me: *cheerily* “…and have fun out there!

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