Category: Awesome Workers

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Way Too Chicken For That

, | England, UK | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Bizarre

(I’m in the process of taking some whole chickens out of the oven.)

Customer: “Don’t do it!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Sticking your head in the oven, don’t do it!”

Me: *realising she’s joking around* “You mean this isn’t a tanning salon?”

Customer: “It really isn’t! Don’t do it!”

Me: “Dang, I’m in the wrong place!”

Customer: “You really are!”

(Nothing like a bit of random to liven up the afternoon!)

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Marco Polo Isn’t Solo

| USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Bizarre, Popular

(It’s a somewhat quiet day in my rather large store, and I’m watching the front end. Suddenly a man comes in, looks at me apologetically, and self-consciously walks up to the desk.)

Man: “I’m about to be really annoying, and I apologize in advance, but we don’t have cell phones at the moment and I’m not sure where my wife is.”

Me: “Oh?”

Man: *suddenly steps back and yells as loud as he can* “MARCO!”

Random Customer: *from somewhere in the back of the store* “POLO!”

Me: “Was that her?”

Man: “No, actually. Strange. Guess she isn’t here. Thanks!”

(I laugh and he leaves, but I suddenly hear another voice from deep within the store.)

Random Customer #2: “MARCO!”

Random Customer #3: “POLO!”

Random Kid: “MARCO!”

Random Customer #4: “POLO!”

My Boss: “MARCO!”

Me: “Why not? POLO!”

(By the time we were done, pretty much everyone in the store was laughing. The guy who unintentionally started it all actually came back in a half-hour or so later with his wife. When they were checking out, I told them the story of what happened and he grinned and yelled ‘Marco!’ which started it all anew!)

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In For A Penny…

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Money, Popular

(I am working as a bank teller at a bank branch near our city’s mall, so a lot of my customers are mall employees either making deposits, getting change for their stores, or cashing their paychecks. I am waiting on a newer employee from of the men’s clothing stores, and since I didn’t know his name yet I had been referring to him (in my head) as Tie Guy.)

Me: “Hi, what can I do for you today?”

Tie Guy: “I just need to get my paycheck cashed, please.”

Me: “No problem, it’ll be just a minute.” *I process his check through the computer* “Would you like it back any certain way?” *I always ask because some customers are extremely picky about their money*

Tie Guy: *jokingly* “American currency is fine.”

(I reach under my counter and pull out a $10 box of rolled pennies, which is pretty heavy and makes a loud thud when it hits the countertop.)

Me: *also jokingly* “I hope you brought a suitcase then. It’s going to take a lot of boxes.”

(Tie Guy just stares at the box, and then me for a few seconds, then starts laughing.)

Tie Guy: “Maybe I should be more specific next time?”

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Getting A Real (Psy)Kick Out Of It

| MA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers, Popular

(I work Saturdays in a small sandwich shop in a very small town. A woman stops in and the following exchange occurs:)

Customer: “I’m on my way to pick up my daughter from a lesson; can you make me a sandwich quickly so I won’t be late? [Large sandwich chain] always takes forever.”

Me: “Sure, it will only take a minute; what can I get you?”

(She orders a simple turkey sandwich and leaves, but comes back later to tell us how amazing it was and how much her daughter loved it. For the next few months after that she stops in every Saturday and orders the same sandwich for her daughter, always in a rush. One day I happen to glance up and see her car pull in, so I quickly prepare her sandwich before she comes in.)

Customer: “I’d like to order [simple turkey sandwich she always orders]. And if you could do it quickly, I’m in a rush.”

Me: “I already have it here for you, ma’am; I saw you pull in and figured you wanted it quickly.” *tries to hand her the sandwich*

Customer: *looking at me suspiciously* “How do you know what I wanted?

Me: “Well, you’ve come in and ordered the same sandwich for your daughter for a few months now. I just remember the order.”

Customer: *still confused* “But… but I didn’t tell you what I wanted yet. How is it possible you remembered?”

(She just could not for the life of her believe we remembered her, even after the same order every single Saturday for three months. What’s more, she continued to come in every Saturday and act amazed when we knew her order.)

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She’s No Shrimping Violet

| Fort Davis, TX, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, One-Liners, Popular

(I am working as a dishwasher at the town’s nicest restaurant, and after a couple of hours am badly in need of a bathroom break. The toilets are located in another section of the building, and I have to pass the entry in order to get to them. As I am hurrying along my way, an elderly gentleman guest grabs me by the wrist and asks in a very grave tone with a distinct German accent:)

Guest: “Excuse me, miss, but how are the shrimp?”

(Having no idea how to answer that question, I blurt the first answer that comes to mind.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I think they’re dead!”

(Howls of laughter followed me to the restroom…)

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