Category: Awesome Workers

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Don’t Scratch The Body

| Crystal City, VA, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Transportation

(I am the customer, picking up a rental car. The clerk has a trainee who is doing the looking-for-damages walk around the car.)

Trainee: *opens trunk* “No dead bodies!”

Me: “Is that an extra cost option?”

Trainee: “Not if you bring it back in the same condition.”

Me: “I’ll do my best…”

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I’ll Drink Outside To That!

| CO, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Popular

(I’m at the renaissance festival with my wife and her friend. I have just purchased a cup of ale and the two ladies want to go into a costume shop to see what is for sale. They have a sign, not only on the pillar, but also on a table outside the shop which reads “Please leave your food and beverages here or outside while shopping!” I stop before going in and my wife calls out to me.)

Wife: “Something wrong?”

Me: “Not at all. I’m going to wait outside. They don’t want me coming in with a drink, cuteness.”

(All of a sudden, three women, all in costume come RUNNING out of nowhere from inside the shop and stop in front of me.)

Me: “Uh…”

All Three Ladies: “HUZZAH FOR THE READER! HUZZAH! HUZZAH! HUZZAH!”

(My wife, her friend, and I start cracking up as they clap.)

Me: “Well, the sign is pretty big and specific.”

Lady #1: “Oh, you wouldn’t believe how many people miss that.”

Lady #2: “Yesterday we had a man come in with orange juice. A kid ran by, smacked his elbow, and he ended up buying a $3,500 costume!”

(I blink, not realizing things in the shop were so expensive.)

Me: “Well… as much as I do want to get my wife a costume, I’d rather get one she wants!”

Lady #3: “And in the right size… and the right color…”

Me: “And not $3,500! No offense!”

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Your Reasoning Is Horrible

| VA, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Bizarre

(I’m the customer in this story and I like to joke around. This happens when an employee tells me to have a good day.)

Me: “Have a good day? You’re not the boss of me.”

Employee: “Well, then, have a horrible day.”

Me: *pretends to think about it before answering cheerfully* “Okay!”