Category: Awesome Workers

A Rewarding Comeback

| Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Workers

(Our chain has a rewards program that allows customers to get points on select purchases.)

Me: “Hello, sir. Do you have your rewards card?”

Customer: “You mean the one that never saves me any money?”

Me: “I’ve stopped taking things personally a long time ago, sir.”

Just Smile And Drive On

| Kansas City, KS, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink

(My boyfriend got us tickets to a race. While he’s scouting out the seats, I see a stand serving spiked hot chocolate.)

Me: “Hi! One spiked hot chocolate, please!”

Server: “Coming right up!”

(She begins making the drink, and starts to make small talk.)

Server: “So, who’s your driver?”

Me: *taken aback* “Err, my boyfriend?”

(She looks at me in confusion, then laughs, realizing I thought she was asking who my designated driver was.)

Server: “No, no, sweetie. I mean for the race.”

Me: *blushing furiously* “Oh! I don’t follow NASCAR; I’m here with my boyfriend.”

Server: “That’s okay. It’s still fun to sit and talk and watch them drive. Enjoy your hot chocolate!”

Me: “Thanks!”

(For the record, my boyfriend’s driver won!)

Database Contains An Astrological Amount Of Information

| USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers

(At work, we have a database with customer information — phone number, email, rewards membership, etc. — that we access when a customer inputs their phone number into our pin pad, in case the customer makes a return and can’t find their receipt.)

Me: “All right, Ma’am, if I could start with your phone number in the pin pad, please?”

Customer: “Sure!” *she puts in her number and her name pops up in the system*

Me: “Are you [Customer]?”

Customer: *gasps* “I am! What else do you know about me?”

Me: *I tap my index and middle fingers to my temples and appear to concentrate* “Are you a Taurus?”

Customer: *laughs* “Close enough!”

I Don’t Work Here, Repeatedly Does Not Work Here

| Jensen Beach, OR, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Technology

(I’m in town for a business meeting and I pop into an electronics store across the street from the hotel I’m staying in. I’m not wearing store colors or even the khakis and polo uniform, but I am dressed in business attire. I’m standing in the aisle looking at picking up a new video card when a woman approaches me with her young teen sons in tow.)

Mother: “Sir… Sir, can you tell me if this video card will be good enough to handle my son’s new game?”

Son: “It’s [Game].”

(I look around and, realizing that all the staff in the area are busy, I go ahead and take a look at the video card.)

Me: “Well, ma’am, if I remember the game’s requirements right, this video card will certainly do the trick, but I seem to have noticed that they have this one—” *I pick another one off the shelf* “–that is better and because it’s on sale, cheaper.”

(As she goes about her way, a second customer steps up to me.)

Other Customer: “Sir, I need help finding more RAM.”

(Seeing once again there is nobody around to help…)

Me: “Well, do you know what kind of RAM you’ll need?”

Other Customer: “Umm… no? Is there more than one kind?”

Me: “Yes and while they do carry RAM here, unless you know the model of your computer or better yet, motherboard, there’s no way to be sure you’re getting the right stuff.”

(She promises me she’ll get the computer’s model and come back later. This happens a couple more times and as I have literally nothing better to do and the store seems unusually busy, I go ahead and help them, never ONCE claiming to work there. This keeps on until a fifth person steps up at the same time a manager steps up to me.)

Customer: “So… I noticed you said ‘they.’ You don’t actually work here do you?”

(The manager speaks up before I can say anything.)

Manager: “No, he doesn’t but I feel like I should be slapping a polo on this guy. [Employee] over there will be happy to help you though.”

Manager: *to me* “So… you need a job?”

Me: “Hah, no, I’m only in town for business, I’m just looking at video cards to kill time.”

Manager: “Well, lemme know if you pick one out; we’ll give you the employee discount for today.”

(We both had a good chuckle about that but when I checked out, true to his word, the guy stopped the sales clerk to make sure I got the employee discount.)

Related:
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 22
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 21
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 20

I’ll Take It Black Death

| Columbus, OH, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Funny Names, Puns

(I am the customer in this story. I walk into my local coffee shop this morning and notice that one of the menu TVs is showing a Blue Screen of Death.)

Me: “I wasn’t expecting to see that on your menu.”

Barista: “Yeah, we have a new Blue Screen of Death Latte. It tastes like a burnt out computer.”

Me: “Mmm… Silicon Dioxide.”

Barista: “Yummy.”

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