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Category: Pets & Animals

Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

Suffering From A Reptile Dysfunction, Part 2

| Lynnwood, WA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

(I was getting my best friend some candy at a grocery store to cheer her up, when I am approached by a lady who is at a sample station with dog treats.)

Customer: “Do happen to have a dog at home?”

Me: “Actually, I don’t. We only have a bunch of reptiles.”

Customer: “Reptiles, huh. When I was out this state, we caught large iguanas about this big—” *stretches out arms, maybe four feet* “—from the jungle and ate them.”

Me: “Iguanas can get very large.”

Customer: “It was delicious, but I don’t recommend eating your pets.”

Me: “No, that would be pretty messed up.”

(Luckily some people walked up to her table and she went to help. I wasn’t sure how to react to someone telling me they enjoy eating the pets I love.)

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Suffering From A Reptile Dysfunction

Can Make Your Head Swim

| Stevens Point, WI, USA | Bizarre, Pets & Animals

(At the call center I work at we get weird calls from people testing out the service all the time. Some include random trivia questions, about random subjects. We have to answer all questions seriously and try to get sources if we can.)

Me: “Thank you for contacting [Company] Concierge. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Hi, I have a question.”

(At this point I see he is calling in from Texas.)

Me: “Certainly, I’ll do my best to answer any question you may have.”

Customer: “Well, this is a serious question. Are you sure?”

Me: “Anything at all. No need to be shy. What’s the question?”

Customer: “Well… um… can deer swim?”

Me: “Let me check for you, sir… Well, sir, I found a YouTube video of a deer swimming, and I’m watching it right now. So, yes. Deer can swim.”

Customer: “For real?”

Me: “Yes, sir, deer can swim.”

Customer: “I just don’t believe it. I need to see it myself. Can you send me a link to that video?”

Me: “Yes, sir. It will just take a second as I send that.”

Customer: *slightly muffled* “Honey, sounds like deer can swim. I know. I can’t believe it.”

A Little Bird Told Her Wrong

| FL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

(I work at a horse supply/tack store. We don’t sell any sort of animal.)

Me: “Hello. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. Do you sell pigeons?”

Me: “What’s a pigeon?”

Customer: “You don’t know what a pigeon is?”

Me: “Well, like the bird, pigeon?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “No, we don’t sell birds.”

Customer: “What type of store is this that you don’t sell birds?”

Me: “Uhm, a horse supply store.”

Customer: “Oh, the yellow pages didn’t say anything about that!”