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Category: Pets & Animals

Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

Has Slugs And Snails And Puppy Dog Tails

| AZ, USA | Pets & Animals

Customer: “I need someone to treat around my water meter.”

Me: “What kind of pests are you seeing?”

Customer: “I am not sure. They are either scorpions or rats. They have tails.”

Me: *aside to coworker* “Puppies have tails. Do you think there are puppies in his water box?”

You Can Snake Around But The Answer Will Be The Same

| VA, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals, Tourists/Travel

(I am a ranger at a state park, leading a group of tourists on a short hike and telling them about the park, then an activity that involves digging through swamp muck to find critters that live in the swamps. I have a ball running and participating in this program and find that most people from 3-70 have as well, though it is geared mostly towards younger kids. Among others, I have with me a family of French speaking guests: a mother, a 7- or 8-year-old boy, and two teenagers.)

Boy: *in broken English* “You will show me snake?”

Me: “If we see a snake I will point it out! I can definitely tell you what type it is and all about it! Keep on the lookout.”

Boy: “No, you show me snake.”

Me: “I… can’t just make one appear. But we do have a good number of snakes in our park! Hopefully we will see one today.”

Boy: *points* “Snake. You tell snake?”

Me: “Oh, did you find one already? Awesome! Show me where? I can tell you all about it!”

Mother: *expectantly* “No, he wants you to find him a snake out here, right now. We want to see a snake, now.”

Me: “I… can not just make one appear, I am sorry. They are wild animals that live in this park and come and go as they please.”

Mother: *scoffs, then talks to her family in French, who also all scoff* “This is not a good program for teenagers!”

Me: “Okay? It is geared towards younger kids mostly, though all ages find it enjoyable, I have found. I had an elderly couple having a ball with me yesterday! You might have more fun if you participate in searching?”

(They continued to talk to each other angrily in French and shoot dirty looks my way as I continued on with the rest of my program for the others. Next time I turned to them, they were gone. 10 minutes later we spotted not one, but three snakes!)

Needs To Bathe In Some Realistic Prices

| Dallas, TX, USA | Money, Pets & Animals

(I work at a doggy daycare that also happens to be a bar, so people come there to drink with their dogs whether they are going to daycare or not. A woman who’s never been there before is hosting a meet up.)

Woman: “My dog has been stinky lately… How much for a bath?”

Me: “A bath for a dog of that size would be $24.”

Woman: “Well, I don’t mean a bath bath… Can’t you just put a little soap and rinse him off?”

Me: “That would be a bath. And it’s $24.”