Category: Pets & Animals

Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!


You Don’t Know Jack About Jackelopes

| Denver, CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals

(The restaurant where I work is western-themed and a popular stop for tourists. I’m ringing a couple out at the on-site gift shop when the lady spots our stuffed Jackelope head mounted above the door.)

Lady: “Is that real?”

Man: “Of course it’s real. Look at it.” *he catches my eye and winks*

Me: *playing along* “Yeah, actually, [Founder] caught this guy out in the south field in the sixties.”

Lady: “Wow! You know I’m from [State] and we don’t have them there. I thought they were a myth!”

Man: “Probably because they look like regular rabbits from a distance, right?”

Me: “Yep. Right up until fall when the Jacks’ horns really come in. The does are harder to spot pretty much year round. Last year, I think, we had a four-prong Jack spotted on the property.”

Lady: “I guess you learn something new every day!” *she snaps a picture with her phone and begins to walk away* “I’m going to have to tell [Friend] that she was wrong…”

Me: *quietly to the man as he turns to follow her* “She’s going to kill you.”

Man: “Worth it.”


Animal Control Out Of Control

| CA, USA | Liars & Scammers, Pets & Animals

(A woman whose dog adoption I handled a few days prior is coming back to return the dog. Our return policy allows for refund or exchange within two weeks only if the animal has a life-threatening illness. This policy is covered, in detail, with every adopter. As I’m helping another customer on the next workstation, I hear my coworker struggling to maintain composure with an increasingly irate customer. I finish the transaction I’m on and hear the magic words:)

Customer: “Let me speak to your supervisor.”

(I turn and address the customer.)

Me: “Hi, I’m the Adoptions Lead. How can I help you?”

(She explains the same thing she’s been telling my coworker.)

Customer: “I have four dogs at home already and did not know that was the legal limit for the area. The police came to my home for something unrelated and told me I had to get rid of my new dog. I want a refund for my adoption fee!”

(She even breaks down into hysterical crying, which she’d also done with my coworker.)

Me: “Ma’am, what my coworker here has already told you is correct. This does not fall within the refund policy. It is your responsibility as a pet owner to know the laws before taking a new pet into your home.”

Customer: “But YOU PEOPLE sell the animals! I told you how many dogs I had at home and you still adopted one out to me anyway. You should have known better! You should know the animal regulations!”

Me: “Ma’am, first off, it is not our responsibility to know all the animal regulations of all the various cities and regions around here. It is always the consumer’s responsibility to make sure they are legal. We have adopters who come here from all over the state. I’ve had adopters from as much as four hours away, as well as out-of-state adopters. We couldn’t possibly know the regulations for all these areas. Secondly, we do contract with [City where the shelter is located] for animal control services, so we do know the guidelines for [City]. However, you do not live in [City].”

Customer: “But I’m just in [Town next to ours]! You should know the regulations for [Town]! You should have a book listing each nearby town and their animal regulations!”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s never going to happen. It is always the consumer’s responsibility and not ours.”

(She continued to argue with me over seller’s responsibility versus buyer’s, until I tell her:)

Me: “Look, we’re not going to agree on this, but we really don’t have to. All I can do for you right now is submit your request to the manager in charge of financials, who is off for the next two days, and see what he decides. Until then, you need to GO HOME, and wait for a response on his decision.”

Customer: “I’m not going to go home; I’m going to go to my lawyer!”

Me: “That’s your prerogative, ma’am. Have a great day.”

(She blows up a few more times over the wording of the request we sent to the manager.)

Customer: “This makes it sound like it’s my fault!”

Me: “Ma’am, this has been written out exactly the way you told it to us”

Customer: “Well, I want you to put in there that the police came out and said I had to return the dog”

Me: “It does say that”

Customer: “But it doesn’t say they gave me a written warning!”.

(Then she started crying at the desk for a few minutes. I was worried we’d have to call the police to remove her, but she finally left. After she left, a coworker told me she knew the lady’s ex-husband. The ex said she’d adopted the dog in an attempt to get her teenage son to spend more time with her instead of at his dad’s house. When that didn’t work, she called her ex and told him to come get “his son’s dog.” He replied that it was her dog and she’d have to take care of it. She threatened to set the dog loose on the street. He told her no, she had to either care for the dog, or take it back to the shelter. He said the police were never involved, which had never made any sense anyway, since police don’t really know enough about animal codes to enforce animal limit — they leave that to animal control.)


Not A Skinny Woman

| CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals

(I’m looking around in a renaissance festival shop that specializes in real animal furs. A woman in a rockin’ outfit walks up to the employee that’s helping me right now.)

Woman: “Excuse me!”

Employee: “Yes?”

Woman: “Your store is a sick madman’s shop! I don’t understand what the h*** is wrong with you! These poor animals all died for this?! You’re a monster!”

(She storms off angrily, flipping off the shop owner.)

Me: “Should I tell her that leather’s made from cows?”

(That rockin’ outfit was made of full leather!)


Can’t Bear To Be Away From Candy

| BC, Canada | Pets & Animals

(This woman is at least in her mid-twenties.)

Customer: “Are there bears here?”

Coworker: “Yes, black bears.”

Customer: “Will they eat our food?”

Coworker: “Not if you leave it in your car overnight.”

Customer: “I like to sleep with candy close to me. Is that okay?”


The Sad State Of Cat Food

| WA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

(A woman flags me down for some help finding cat food.)

Customer: “I want something that’s made in the U.S. Nothing from China. And it has to be high protein, high fat. No chicken. He won’t eat that s***.”

Me: “That’s great, because plenty of our cat food are made in the U.S.!” *gestures to one brand* “This one sounds perfect, and it has non-chicken proteins like salmon.”

Customer: “He told me he doesn’t like seafood.”

Me: *thinking how her cat told her this* “Well, it also comes in quail, turkey, venison, and lamb as well. Lots of different meats that don’t go anywhere near the ocean!”

Customer: “What state specifically is it made in?”

Me: “I’m not sure…” *inspecting packaging*

Customer: “Because I don’t buy from redneck states.”

Me: “This one’s made in California.”

Customer: *pause* “Well, I guess made by Mexicans is better than from a redneck state!” *slides an armful of cans into her cart and walks away*

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