Fifty Shades Is A Tale As Old As Time

(I have just watched a teaser trailer for the new Beauty and the Beast which is in theaters the week after my birthday, and mention it to my husband. I am trying to convince him to take me, and have come up with a surefire way for HIM to make the decision.)

Me: “So, I was thinking. Going out to the movies is pretty expensive, but I think you should either take me for Valentine’s Day or my birthday.”

Husband: “What’s coming out on Valenti— Wait… No. Absolutely not. I am NOT taking you to see Fifty Shades!”

Me: “So it’s settled? You’ll take me to Beauty and the Beast?”

Husband: *grumbling that the illusion of choice is no choice at all*