Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Testicles

I’m a cis straight man who enjoys sewing, knitting, and cross-stitching. I have a small online shop where I sell several items I’ve made and take requests for custom orders, but I generally refuse to sell in person unless I have a lot of extra stuff to get rid of. Usually, this just means renting a booth at a local flea market.

One summer weekend, I decide to rent a booth at the flea market, with my girlfriend helping me for the weekend. A man in his late twenties or early thirties approaches my booth and speaks to my girlfriend.

Customer: “Hi, do you have any scarves here? I’m looking for a birthday present for my girlfriend, and she loves these kinds of homemade things.”

Girlfriend: “Aww, that’s sweet! I’m sorry, but what you see here is all that we have left. I don’t see any scarves, so we must be sold out. You could always talk to [My Name] over there and see about getting a custom-made scarf!”

Customer: *Still talking to my girlfriend* “That could work. When could you have it shipped to me?”

Girlfriend: “You would need to talk to [My Name]. He makes everything. I’m just here helping him out!”

Customer: *Turning to me with a sneer* “Oh, you made this stuff?”

Me: “Yep, I did!”

Customer: “Were you raised by two [homophobic slurs for gay men] or something? Seriously, bro? Sewing?”

Me: “You need to leave my booth now.”

Customer: *Realizing I’m not going to react to his taunts* “Wait, I still need a gift for my girlfriend. Do you have an online store or something?”

I see my girlfriend quietly hiding the business cards that advertise my online store, because she knows I refuse to do business with people like him whenever possible, including online.

Me: “Nope. Please leave now.”

Customer: “What the f***, dude? I just need a gift for my girl. Are you a f****** [homophobic slur] or something, who only sells to other [homophobic slurs]? Give me a f****** scarf or something!”

Several nearby police officers — always a common presence at this flea market, because they are allowed to browse themselves as long as they are still ready to perform their duty — arrived before he could turn physically violent, and they escorted him not only away from my booth, but out of the flea market entirely. My girlfriend and I closed the booth for a while to wander around the market and cool down, but we still managed to sell out of everything we brought with us. I also took several orders for custom work from people who were happy to support me after I stood my ground against a bigoted bully.