Can’t Erase The Evidence

(I have a guy friend who sits next to me in one of my classes. He jokingly steals pencils and erasers off my desk when I’m focused on something else. He does it so often that I’ve begun to reflexively grab his arm before he takes something.)

Friend: *reaches out*

Me: *grabs arm* “What’d you steal this time?”

Friend: *pulls his arm out of my grasp, takes my hand, and kisses it* “Your heart, milady.”

Me: “Nice try. Now give me back that eraser. I know it’s under your desk.”

Friend: “F***!”

(He’s still one of my best friends.)