Can’t Claw That Back

(Two elderly ladies are browsing the assorted jewellery in a display cabinet on the counter.)

Me: “If there’s anything you want to look at, just ask.”

Customer #1: “Yes, can we see that pink brooch at the back?”

Me: “Certainly.”

(I get the brooch out and hand it over; it’s an enamelled brooch in the shape of a crab.)

Me: “There you go.”

Customer #2: “It’s a crab.”

Me: “Well, we are a seaside town.”

Customer #1: “Ah, it must be for the star-sign Cancer.”

Me: “That works, too.”

Customer #2: “You could get it for [Relative]; she’s a Cancer.”

Me: “So’s my wife.”

Customer #1: “Oh?”

Me: “And, come to think of it, so were three previous girlfriends.”

Customer #2: “Really?”

Me: “Yes. How come I always get the crabs?”

(Pause.)

Me: “Ahem, perhaps I could have phrased that better.”

Customer #1: “Yes, perhaps you could have!”

(Fortunately, they both then burst out laughing. At least they bought the brooch.)