Calling His Bluff

(We’ve recently hired a new administrator. He’s a young man with no previous admin experience, but he’s had a wide voluntary roles and has a fantastic attitude. It’s his second or third day working for us, and he’s manning the phones.)

Admin: “Good afternoon, you’re through to [company name]. This is [admin] speaking.”

Caller: *says something*

Admin: “I’m afraid [manager] is in a meeting right now, but I can take a message and have her call yo—”

Caller: *says something*

Admin: “I’m sorry, but unless it’s an actual matter of life and death, she won’t speak to anyone until after the meeting.”

Caller: *says something*

Admin: “No, my death doesn’t count sir. It wouldn’t cause her enough paperwork.”

(He looks up and sees me laughing and rolls his eyes. The caller is yelling so loudly, that he holds the handset away from his head.)

Admin: “I’m afraid shouting won’t help sir. I can just move the handset away.”

(All of us in the office are curious, so I hold up a sign telling the admin to press the speaker button so we can listen in.)

Admin: *presses speaker button*

Caller:  “—TO ME BOY! I’M HER F***ING BROTHER! PUT ME THROUGH RIGHT NOW!”

(The admin looks at me quizzically to see if the caller is telling the truth. I nod my head side-to-side.)

Admin: “I’m sorry sir, but if you were related to her you would know she doesn’t have a brother.”

Caller: “JUST PUT ME THROUGH, YOU IGNORANT LITTLE S***!”

Admin: “I’m hardly ignorant, sir.”

Caller: “F*** YOU! I’LL HAVE YOUR F***ING JOB FOR THIS!” *hangs up*

Coworker: “Who was that? I’ll have to add him to the caller blacklist.”

Admin: “I think he said he was [name], from [company]?”

Coworker: “[Name]? S***, he could actually get [manager] to fire you. But don’t worry; we’ll tell her what he said, and he won’t know what hit him.”

(When my manager comes out of her meeting, my coworker explains everything. The manager sends the admin home early and leaves early herself. The next day, however, we discover that my manager visited the rude caller and talked to his boss about his conduct. She also bought a box of chocolates for the admin for, as she put it, “winding that a***hole up so well.”)