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The Cake Is A Lie, But With A Really Good Excuse

, , , , , , | Romantic | March 5, 2018

(I am female in my late 20s. This has been the worse fortnight of my life so far; I was made redundant at work, I fell out with a very close friend over something really stupid, and someone rear-ended me. My period has also started, making everything a lot worse, as I get extremely hormonal during this time. Now, my glasses have broken. I emotionally break down, and cry at my boyfriend.)

Me: *whilst sobbing* “I have no friends, no vision, no car, and no money to sort out two of those problems! AND I’M BLEEDING EVERYWHERE!”

Boyfriend: “Shall I go get some cake?”

Me: *stops wailing, but still sniffing* “Cake?”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, let’s go to [My Favourite Cake Place].”

Me: *sniffing* “Really?”

Boyfriend: “Really, really.”

(He goes on the cake trip. He comes back sooner than I’d expect, and hands me the bag, which is too light to have cake in it. I open it up and find a ring box with a ring in it.)

Boyfriend: “Will yo—”

Me: *truly distressed* “Where’s the cake?!”

Boyfriend: “I… Erm.”

Me: “You said there would be cake!”

Boyfriend: “Okay… You’re irrationally—”

Me: *irrationally upset* “I am not irrationally upset! You promised cake! Instead, I get a ring that I can’t even see properly, because I have no vision! How could you betray me like this?!” *ugly, hysterical sobbing*

(He did go get me cake. And I did apologise to him over being overly emotional and dramatic. Surprisingly, he still wanted to marry me after that, so I said yes.)

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