By Doing Nothing, The Problem Solves Itself

I work in a call centre for a company that sends out collectible subscriptions like DVD sets and magazines.

Customer: *on the phone* “I’m turning you in for mail fraud! I don’t want any more of your stuff!”

Me: *checking* “Okay, you were already taken off the list a few weeks ago.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t want your magazine!”

Me: “I’ll need to transfer you to the magazine department so they can cancel that for you.”

Customer: “I don’t get the magazine!”

Me: “So you’re only getting DVDs, then?

Customer: “I haven’t gotten any DVDs!”

Me: “So… what are you getting from us?”

Customer: “Nothing!”

Me: “Okay… then I guess you’re all set…”

Customer: “Okay!” *hangs up*

This story is part of the Customer Complaints That Resolve Themselves roundup!

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