Buy A Bible Or You’ll Have The Devil To Pay
(Where I live, people are quite devout when it comes to their religious beliefs. I am waiting in line at a local bookstore. The woman ahead of me puts a Bible down on the counter, and the cashier reluctantly picks it up and scans it.)
Cashier: “That will be, umm, £6.66, please.”
(The woman and I both stare at the little display, showing that a discount percentage has been applied due to a sale.)
Woman: “I don’t know what to do. It’s the Holy Bible, but it’s clearly Satanic.”
Me: “It’s just the sale price.”
Woman: “I know. Are the owners Satanists?”
Cashier: “I don’t think so. The sale was decided by the publishers, as they’ve released a newer edition with a hardback.”
Woman: “Is it more holy?”
Cashier: “It’s definitely more expensive.”
Woman: ”I don’t know what to do…”
(After some serious consideration, the woman agrees to buy both the sale Bible and the new £37.99 edition with an elaborate hardback and velvet marker.)
Me: “What will you do with the cheaper one?”
Woman: “I’ll take it to my church and dip it in holy water. If it doesn’t burn, I’ll donate it.”
(Finally, I’m able to purchase my book.)
Me: “Have you had that a lot since the sale?”
Cashier: “We’ve had people coming in with priests and vicars. I’ve even had holy water sprayed on me. I think the publishers are just playing a joke on us.”
This story is featured in our Religious Customers roundup!
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