Bromancing The Stone

(Two of my male friends are basically soul mates. They have been best friends for almost their entire lives, and can quite easily finish each others thoughts and sentences. They’re completely secure in their sexualities, too. While they’re both straight, they sometimes appear to be a gay couple to people who don’t know them well.)

Friend #1: “So, [Friend #2], how about that girl you were chatting to earlier? She was pretty fit.”

Friend #2: “Yeah, but she was as dumb as a box of rocks. Can’t have sex with someone who can barely read.”

(A new friend in the group suddenly pipes up.)

New Friend: “Wait a sec. I thought you two were gay?”

Me: “Haha, yeah. They seem like that. They’re both totally straight.”

New Friend: “Oh… So why are they holding hands?”

(We all peer around the table to see that they are indeed holding hands. They look at their hands, then up at each other. Then they speak in unison:)

Both: “I don’t know who started this, but I’ll be d***ed if I let go first.”