Blind To The Naked Truth

(I’m a lifeguard. I get a complaint that the ladies changing room is dirty. I go in to clean it up. I am approached by an elderly patron who is as naked as the day she was born.)

Patron: “Can I ask you a question?”

Me: “Umm… sure. Go ahead.”

Patron: “Do you like working in a pool?”

Me: “Yeah. It’s not the greatest job in the world, but it’s better than working retail or fast food.”

Patron: “I think I would hate it! I mean, you must see lots of people wearing clothes that they’re too fat for.”

Me: “Yeah. That happens occasionally. Fortunately, I don’t need to stare at them. I just need to make sure they’re not drowning every thirty seconds or so.”

Patron: “But still! So many fat people come here! And then you poor souls have to clean up the changing rooms, where so many people walk around completely naked without any shame!”

(The patron is still standing there in all her naked glory.)

Me: “Yeah. It’s even more awkward when the patron engages me in a long conversation.”

Patron: “Exactly! Some people just have no shame!”