Birthdays Are Not Their Calling

(My brothers never remember birthdays, so I make sure to always text them whenever a birthday comes up. It’s my mother’s birthday, and I, my parents, and my oldest brother have just finished dinner. I texted my youngest brother the day before to remind him to call, but he hasn’t yet.)

Me: *texting brother* “Call mum!”

(Mum’s phone rings.)

Mum: “Hi, [Brother].”

Brother: “[My Name] said I had to call you.”

Mum: *trying not to laugh* “Did she? What for?”

Brother: “I’m not— Oh, right! Happy birthday!”