Better Than Being With An Airbag

| Romantic | July 2, 2013

(My boyfriend and I are in the basement. For the past 20 minutes, he has been refusing to let me get up based on the ‘fact’ that he is my ‘seatbelt’.)

Me: “Get off! I need to get up!”

Boyfriend: “I can’t let you get up! I am your seatbelt! If I let you go, you might fall off the couch and get injured!”

Me: “For your information, I have fallen off this couch before, and it really didn’t hurt that much!”

Boyfriend: “Exactly, and that happened because I wasn’t here being your seatbelt!”

Me: “You didn’t even know me at the time! That was in the 7th grade; you met me the year after!”

(My dad knocks on the basement door.)

Me: “COME IN! Seriously I don’t need a seatbelt! It’s a couch!”

Dad: “…what’re you two doing?”

Me: “[Boyfriend] is claiming to be my seatbelt, and will not let me get up!”

Boyfriend: “You could get seriously injured!”

Dad: “Alright then…”

(My dad disappears into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later.)

Dad: “Still?”

Me: “YES!”

Dad: “Tell him the keys are out of the ignition, and the couch is no longer moving.”

(I give my boyfriend a smug look.)

Boyfriend: *sighs* “Fiiiiiine…” *lets go*

Dad: “Good, alright I’ll see you guys later.”

(As soon as my dad leaves, he wraps his arms around my waist again.)

Boyfriend: “I’m your seatbelt again!”

Me: “Gosh darn it! This is so going on Not Always Romantic.”

Boyfriend: “Yesssss!”

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