Best To Just Not Speak At All

, , , , , | Working | June 27, 2016

(My coworker is chatting with our boss across the way from me and I overhear this gem:)

Coworker: “…all I’m saying, these Italian women: WHOA. CRAZY. Stay away from them, seriously. All of them are crazy.”

Me: “Ahem?” *I cross my arms and stare at him in fake annoyance* “What are you trying to say?”

Coworker: “What? You’re not Italian.”

Me: “Half on my mother’s side. Are you saying I’m half crazy?”

Coworker: “Nah, I mean… I just… You know what I mean. I was just kidding!”

(As I get back to work, my coworker starts up again:)

Coworker: “…and I’m not looking forward to St Patrick’s Day this year. The bar is going to be a mess. Everyone who’s even a little Irish takes that as an excuse to drink and cause trouble—“

Me: “Ahem.”

Coworker: “What?”

Boss: “You’re forgetting her last name is [Common Irish Surname].”

Coworker: “Well, s***, you’re just out to gyp me out of every stereotype that is still politically correct to make fun of!”

Me: “Ahem.”

Coworker: “What?”

Me: “You can’t say ‘gyp.’ My great-grandmother was Romani.”

Coworker: “DUDE.”

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