Best To Be As Quiet As A Mouse And Move On

Caller: “My mouse isn’t working!”

Me: “What is the issue with your mouse, sir?”

Caller: “It doesn’t let me move across the whole screen! I run out of room!”

Me: “Have you tried picking up the mouse and putting it on the opposite corner of your mousepad and then continuing to move it in the desired direction?”

Caller: “I work with computers every day! What makes you think that… Oh, that worked.”

Me: “Happy to help, sir. How long have you been in your computer job?”

Caller: “Ten years, why?”

Me: “…no reason.”