Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered
Our highest-voted stories!

An Open And Shut Reason

, | Right | September 25, 2013

(Our restaurant is open 24 hours a day, and only closes for two days every year. One day in the middle of summer, we unexpectedly close for the day and open the next morning.)

Me: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Well you can get me the [meal] that I couldn’t get yesterday morning because you guys were closed!”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Your total will be [total].”

Customer: “Well I think I should get it for free since you guys were closed. I mean, what was so d*** important you had to close in the middle of summer? What about all the people who need coffee before work and need to buy lunch?”

Me: “I can get the manager for you, but I highly doubt she will give you your meal for free.”

(I call the manager over and the customer explains again why he thinks his food should be free.)

Manager: “Sir, I know it was inconvenient for you and all our other customers, but the store was closed yesterday so we could attend a funeral for a beloved coworker that passed away two days ago. If you want compensation for the inconvenience you will have to take the matter up with God.”

(The customer doesn’t bother paying and just leaves the store. Thankfully, the majority of our customers are much nicer about the whole ordeal.)

1 Thumbs
1,754

We All Half Our Favorites

| Right | October 1, 2012

(My friend and I both volunteer at a daycare for school credit. Although we try to act like we don’t while we’re on the clock, we both do have our favorite students.)

My Friend: “So, who are your favorites?”

Me: “[Little Girl] and [Little Boy].”

My Friend: “I’ve met [Little Girl]. She’s a good kid.”

Me: “Yeah, she’s a sweetie. It took awhile for me and [Little Boy] to warm up to one another, though.”

My Friend: “Oh, yeah?”

Me: *laughs* “On my first day, he drew a picture and gave it to me.”

My Friend: “Aw, that’s so sweet!”

Me: “It was of him karate-chopping me in half.”

My Friend: “…”

Me: “Sometimes, I don’t know if I want to hug that kid or smack him.”

(This was almost two years ago. The picture hangs on my bedroom wall to this day.)

1 Thumbs
1,816

Bowl Me Over With Lies

| Right | July 30, 2015

(This is an upscale bowling alley that allows you to make lane reservations. This is probably only my second or third day working there.)

Me: *on the phone* “Thank you for calling [Bowling Alley]. This is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Can I make a reservation?”

Me: “Yes, sir, but I’m afraid we only allow online reservations.”

Customer: “That’s stupid.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that’s just our policy.”

Customer: “Can’t you just make an exception since I already called you?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. We aren’t allowed to manually enter reservations into our computers. But you can go to our website and set one up there. Would you like me to help you with that?”

Customer: *says this in a completely serious tone* “Well, it just so happens that ALL of my fingers are broken! So now what?”

Me: *completely without thinking* “How are you going to bowl?!”

Customer: “Never mind.” *click*

1 Thumbs
1,621

Enough To Make You Quai

, , , , | Right | August 20, 2010

(I am trying to help a customer with a product while she is talking on the phone to her friend. Every time she asks me a question, she goes back to talking to her friend while I give her the answer so I have to repeat myself.)

Customer: “Do you have something that will help me with my period?”

Me: “Dong Quai.”

Customer: “I’m not crying!”

Me: “No, the product is called Dong Quai.”

Customer: “Oh.”


This story is part of our Tongue-Tied-Customers roundup!

Read the next Tongue-Tied-Customers roundup story!

Read the Tongue-Tied-Customers roundup!

1 Thumbs
1,935

A First-Class Jerk

, , , , , | Right | May 30, 2021

I’m flying back from a sales conference in Vegas, and I am able to upgrade to a first-class seat. We have a very annoying sales VP that’s on the same flight. She is the snobby, entitled type who brags about having a full-time nanny and giant mansion in the suburbs, and she generally treats people who work for her like servants.

She sees me in a first-class seat as she is making her way to coach.

VP: “How did you get that seat?”

Me: “I used points to upgrade.”

As people are getting settled in, she makes her way back up to the first-class cabin.

VP: “I want to speak with the lead flight attendant.”

Lead Flight Attendant: “How can I help you?”

VP: “One of my underlings is sitting in first class, and I need to switch with him since I’m higher on the corporate ladder.”

The lead flight attendant can’t believe what he’s hearing, but she won’t take no for an answer. Finally…

Lead Flight Attendant: “Ma’am, you have to go back to her seat or you will be escorted from the plane.”

She trotted off back to coach after having made a complete a** of herself to the entire first-class cabin.

1 Thumbs
660