Best Early Anniversary Gift Ever

, , , , , , | Working | October 13, 2019

(My boyfriend and I have been together since I was in ninth grade. We’re out for lunch at a fast food place.)

Waitress: *to me* “What can I get you?”

Me: “I’ll have a chocolate shake.”

Boyfriend: “I’ll have fries, a cheeseburger, and a… vanilla shake.”

(The waitress nods, smiling at my boyfriend, and then disappears. She comes back with my boyfriend’s order, but mine takes an extra fifteen minutes. She kinda throws it down, which makes it threaten to fall over. I ignore her, until she comes back with two stacks of napkins. She hands one to each of us, and my boyfriend looks at his for a second before sneering.)

Boyfriend: “Be right back, babe.”

(Turns out, she has written, “If you ever want to dump the slut and hit me up…” with her Snapchat handle and number on the napkin. My boyfriend goes over and shows it to the manager, and then tells the manager that he wants to do something first, before the waitress gets chewed out. So, he comes back to the table, grabs my hand, takes me over to the door to the kitchen, waits until the waitress comes out, and dips me.)

Boyfriend: “Happy anniversary, babe!” *kisses me*

(Our anniversary isn’t until August, but… Best. Present. Ever. Her face was hilarious when I came back up for air.)

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