Being Short With Him

(I am with a good friend in a shopping centre, and we are just walking around and chatting when a trashy-looking guy approaches us.)

Guy: *to me* “Your shorts are really ugly.”

Me: *taken aback*

Guy: “I hate it when girls wear high-waist shorts; they’re, like, not sexy at all.”

Me: “Oh, no! I must go home and change my entire outfit immediately because some guy I JUST met doesn’t like my shorts! Thank god you told me; otherwise I would have been SO embarrassed!”

Guy: *turning red*

Me: *louder so more people in the vicinity can hear* “Thank you so much for pointing out what’s wrong with what I’m wearing, despite the fact that I actually don’t give a f*** what you think and nor would any girl. So, piss off a**hole.” *walks away*

Friend: *grinning* “This is why we’re friends.”