Being Five-Fifths Of A Jerk

(My boyfriend and I have been going out for years, are living together and very comfortable with each other. I’m brushing my teeth while he takes a shower. Suddenly, I notice him peeing.)

Me: “Do you mind not doing that?”

Boyfriend: “Why not? It’s my shower.”

Me: “It’s my shower too, and you won’t let me do that.”

Boyfriend: *jokingly* “You’re a girl. That would be gross. Anyway, I pay three-fifths of the rent, so it’s still my shower.”

Me: “I pay two-fifths. Can’t I pee in my two-fifths of it?”

Boyfriend: “Hmm. Let’s take a vote. Oh, look. I have three-fifths of the vote, I win! And I say you can’t!”

(He giggles and continues peeing.)