Being Cross-The-Street Wise

(I’m on the bus, heading to work. The driver stops for a woman who doesn’t quite get on the bus.)

Woman: “Are you going downtown?”

Driver: “No, that bus stops across the street.”

Woman: “I need to get downtown.”

Driver: “Okay, you’ll have to cross the street.”

Woman: “If I get on the bus, will you take me downtown?”

Driver: “No, ma’am.”

Woman: “Why?! Google says [route number] goes downtown!”

(I don’t wanna be late for work, so I go near the door.)

Me: “Cross the freaking street! We’ve got places to be!”

(The woman glares at me but walks towards the crosswalk. I turn to the bus driver.)

Me: “Sorry, I should have been nicer. Do you need to throw me off?”

Driver: “H*** nah! If you hadn’t already paid, I’d give you a free ride.”