Behold The Field In Which I Grow My F***s. Lay Thine Eyes Upon It And Thou Shalt See That It Is Barren, Part 3

England, Grocery Store, Jerk, Last Day, Perfect Comebacks, UK | Right | July 10, 2024

It’s my last day working at the supermarket, and it’s taking foreverrrrr. What’s not helping is a customer ranting at me for over three minutes (it’s a long time when you’re just sitting there smiling sadistically while a customer vents — trust me) about the cost of butter. Eventually, he realises I have yet to do or say anything.

Customer: “Well?”

Me: “Well, what, sir?”

Customer: “Aren’t you going to do something?”

Me: “Oh, sorry, sir. I assumed you were just venting because it would be rather silly of you to assume that complaining about the cost of items in a national supermarket chain where the prices are decided by massive corporate offices and their expensive algorithms could be affected by the minimum-wage worker on the checkout, wouldn’t it?”

Customer: “I… uh… D*** it, I am complaining! It’s good customer service to take action on a complaint!”

Me: “There is a feedback box by the customer service counter next to the exit, sir.”

Customer: “I’m going to complain about you, too!”

Me: “That’s wonderful, sir. Please let them know that I am Rachel B., as there is also a Rachel Y. working here today.”

Customer: “You’re not bothered that I am going to complain about you?”

Me: “I’m sure the complaint will be given the exact amount of consideration it needs, sir. Cash or card?”