Become A Ho Ho Holy Ghost

(My parents’ way of dealing with the stereotypical awkward child questions was to honestly answer any question asked on the assumption that if we asked the question, we were ready for the answer. If we didn’t ask the obvious follow up questions then clearer we weren’t ready for that step. As such we’ve never had the big reveals or such that media talks about. Sometime before I was born this practice resulted in the following conversation.)

Random Lady: “Oh, aren’t you adorable. Are you sending your letters to Santa Claus?”

(My then elementary school ages older brother looks up at her with a perplexed expression.)

Brother: “Santa Claus is dead.”

(The old lady was shocked to hear that coming from a little boy. My brother was just confused that an adult didn’t know about Saint Nicholas.)