Be Fearful, Not Tearful

| Working | January 7, 2016

(My office is having a cookout, and I have offered to prepare the vegetables to go on the burgers. I also happen to be one of those lucky people who are not particularly sensitive to onion fumes.)

Coworker: *walking up behind me while I’m chopping onions* “It’s okay, [My Name]! It’s okay to cry!”

Me: *makes eye contact, raises eyebrow*

Coworker: “Whoa! Your eyes aren’t even watering or anything.”

Me: *monotone* “I am invincible. Fear me.”

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