Bathing In Stupidity

Me: “Good afternoon, and thank you for calling [Pet Store]. This is [My Name]; how can I help you today?”

Customer: “I want to bring my dog in tomorrow to get grooming done.”

Me: “Sure thing. Let me get you set up. What would you like done?”

Customer: “I want what he got last time.”

Me: “Okay, according to the computer, last time he was in he got a haircut. Did you want the same haircut this time?”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “No, I want what he got last time but no haircut.”

Me: “Okay, so, no haircut. Just a bath, then?”

Customer: *very angry now* “NO. I WANT WHAT I GOT LAST TIME, BUT NO HAIRCUT. WHY IS THAT SO HARD FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND?”

Me: “Sir, you said you did not want a haircut, but that is what you got last time. If you do not want a haircut, he will just be getting a bath, which I can set you up for in just a minute.”

Customer: *practically screaming at this point* “NO! YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO ME! NO ONE EVER GETS THIS RIGHT! WHY CAN’T ANYONE IN THAT STORE GET ANYTHING RIGHT? I WANT WHAT I GOT LAST TIME. I DON’T WANT A BATH! I WANT WHAT I GOT LAST TIME.”

Me: *very done at this point* “I apologize. Let me set you up. A special haircut without the haircut for tomorrow.”

Customer: *pleased now* “Yes, that’s what I want.”

Me: “All right, how does four o’clock sound?”

Customer: “Great. I will be there at four o’clock tomorrow!”

Me: “Great. We will see you tomorrow, and you have a wonderful evening!”

Coworker: “Did that guy want a bath for tomorrow?”

Me: “Oh, no, he wants a haircut appointment but no haircut.”

Coworker: “So, a bath?”

Me: “Yes.”