Bagged Far More Than He Bargained For

, , , , , , | Right | July 30, 2018

(I’m a customer here. I am with my girlfriend, doing some shopping in a rather posh and famous department store in the middle of the city that is known for being quite expensive. Some people who shop there can be quite snotty. We are there looking for a present for my girlfriend’s sister’s birthday. I’m in a suit that does not look like a uniform at all. A customer comes up to me, holding a printed-out list with pictures of bags on.)

Customer: “I want you to find [three items]. I’m in a hurry; just let me see them, and then you can pack them up for me.”

Me: “Uh, I’m sorry, but I don’t work here.”

Customer: “Look: this is for my wife. I have a job to get back to; now do yours.”

Me: “I seriously do not work here, and besides, there is a line. There are two people behind us.”

Customer: *shoves the papers hard into my chest* “Here. Just go and find them. Don’t be a lazy c*** and fob me off. I know you lot work on commission, so it’s in your interest to serve me. Now do this, or get a real f****** job like me!”

Me: “Okay, sir, would that be the job whose company’s logo is on your umbrella?”

Customer: “Yes! Get me my bags now!”

Me: “Sure. I just have to ask your name to put you on the list for getting in line. And out of curiosity, it wouldn’t happen to be [Location down the street] you work at?”

Customer: “For f***’s sake. It’s [Customer], and yes, I do. Now, I have to go back there, so hurry yourself up, boy.”

(I pull out my phone, call my office, and ask to look up the customer’s name. As I’m doing this, he starts to go off, raising his voice about how I am bad at my job, should be fired, what kind of s*** am I pulling, etc. He calms down very quickly once I start to say his details for his work back to him. I thank my secretary and tell her I’ll be calling her back in a moment.)

Me: “[Customer], I’m [My Name], and I’m [Position making me his boss’ boss]. I wish I could say it’s nice to meet you. Due to your actions here today, it has become unclear whether you are a person we wish to have associated with [Company]; you have been placed on a two-week supervision period. If during those two weeks any of your work or behavior is unsatisfactory in any way, your employment will be terminated. Now, please take your papers back and wait for someone who works here to help you.”

(I called my secretary back, while the guy looked at me like I’d slapped him.)

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