Badside Manners

(It’s my first time for a pelvic exam. I have just recently got over a bout of pleurisy and may have to have my gallbladder taken out soon. I’m unable to move my legs or back completely because of the pain from my pleurisy.)

Doctor: “Do you have hip problems?”

Me: “No, but my back hurts and it’s hard to move my legs without too much discomfort.”

Doctor: “I have 90-year-old women with arthritis who can move more than that.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m in a lot of pain. I’m not that flexible to begin with.”

(The exam continues. She is constantly telling me to move back, or forward, or to stop squirming. I begin to sob uncontrollably and bite on my hand to keep from screaming.)

Doctor: “You’re making this really hard on me. I’ve never had anyone complain of pain before.”

Me:“I…think I can do it.”

(She continues the exam, but I’m crying so bad I can’t see. I hold onto the bed but it only gets worse.)

Doctor: “Well, if you’re not going to cooperate, I’m going to find you someone else to work with.”

Me: *still crying*

Doctor: “I’ve been working for 30 years and no one’s ever made this as hard as you have. And this has just been miserable for you AND me. You need to find a new doctor because this just isn’t going to work.”

Me: “Why are you yelling at me?”

Doctor: “I’m not yelling! Now, are we done here?”

(I nod affirmatively and continue crying, as my stomach spasms in pain and anxiety. The doctor storms out. I’m never going back!)