Badside Manners

(It’s my first time for a pelvic exam. I have just recently got over a bout of pleurisy and may have to have my gall bladder taken out soon. I’m unable to move my legs or back completely because of the pain from my pleurisy.)

Doctor: “Do you have hip problems?”

Me: “No, but my back hurts and it’s hard to move my legs without too much discomfort.”

Doctor: “I have 90-year-old women with arthritis who can move more than that.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m in a lot of pain. I’m not that flexible to begin with.”

(The exam continues. She is constantly telling me to move back, or forward, or to stop squirming. I begin to sob uncontrollably and bite on my hand to keep from screaming.)

Doctor: “You’re making this really hard on me. I’ve never had anyone complain of pain before.”

Me:“I…think I can do it.”

(She continues the exam, but I’m crying so bad I can’t see. I hold onto the bed but it only gets worse.)

Doctor: “Well, if you’re not going to cooperate, I’m going to find you someone else to work with.”

Me: *still crying*

Doctor: “I’ve been working for 30 years and no one’s ever made this as hard as you have. And this has just been miserable for you AND me. You need to find a new doctor because this just isn’t going to work.”

Me: “Why are you yelling at me?”

Doctor: “I’m not yelling! Now, are we done here?”

(I nod affirmatively and continue crying, as my stomach spasms in pain and anxiety. The doctor storms out. I’m never going back!)