Infinitely Loopy, Part 4

Employee #1: “Hi, my name’s Chris. How can I help you today?”

Me: “Hi, I was wondering how to get on to my online banking account. It’s acting weird.”

Employee #1: “Okay, can I get your information?”

Me: *gives her my information*

Employee #1: “Okay, [my name]. I’ll get you started. Unfortunately, this isn’t my area of expertise, so I’m going to transfer you to [different branch]. Please hold…”

(20 minutes pass.)

Employee #2: “Hi, [my name]. My name’s Thomas. How can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, I was directed to you for help with my online banking account, because it’s—”

Employee #2: “I’m sorry, but I can’t help you with that. Let me transfer you to someone that can help you.”

Me: “Wait, but—” *elevator music begins playing*

(30 minutes pass.)

Employee #3: “Hi! What can I help you with, [my name]?”

Me: “I’m just trying to find someone to help me with my online bank—”

Employee #3: “Yeah, I’m going to have to transfer you. No one in this department knows how to handle that.”

Me: “No, wait, I just—” *elevator music plays again*

(10 minutes pass. This time, a familiar voice picks up.)

Employee #1: “Hi, my name’s Chris. How can I help you?”