A Back-Breaking Need For Attention

(My mother-in-law has always been an attention-seeker, to the point that she has let her health fail, and she has intentionally fallen over or injured herself just to get people to notice her. We mostly ignore it, because we have gotten used to her antics. We have gathered up for Christmas to swap presents. At first, we were going to gather at my brother-in-law’s house, but since my mother-in-law threw such a fit, it got switched to her tiny house. As a result, there are ten of us crammed in this small living room with only a few seats, while the rest of us stand. My brother-in-law opens a present from his wife, which turns out to be a sonogram picture. Everyone jumps in on the hugs and congratulations immediately, except for my mother-in-law, who I notice slides out of her chair, braces herself on the floor, and then flops to her back.)

Mother-In-Law: *screaming* “I fell! I fell out of my chair! Oh, my back, it hurts!”

(Everyone immediately rushes to help her, except for my husband and me. He also noticed her intentionally slide onto the ground. He goes to check on her back.)

Husband: *barely touching her back* “Does it hurt here?”

Mother-In-Law: “Yes! Ow, yes! It does!”

Husband: “Here?”

Mother-In-Law: “Yes, it hurts all over! I need you to call me an ambulance.”

Husband: *not even touching her now* “What about here?”

Mother-In-Law: “Ow, yes! Stop doing that; it hurts.”

Husband: “I didn’t even touch you that time, Mom.”

(She claimed that it hurt so bad, she couldn’t tell whether he touched her or not. Either way, people clued in on what she did and had very little sympathy for her antics.)