At Least Your Marriage Is Secure

(I finish up a meeting with corporate office. I pack my laptop up and go to lunch. Not five minutes in to my lunch my district manager pages me with a security code. I rush to the front to see what’s going on.)

District Manager: “Did you see that man? He was carrying a big black bag and came from the back of the store. I think he stole something. His bag was empty when he came in now it’s full?”

Me: “What man are you talking about?”

District Manager: “The one with the dark hair. There!” *pointing out the window* “The one getting into the that truck. Remember his face! I think he stole from us.”

Me: “Sir, I will remember that face well… seeing how that’s MY HUSBAND… who picked up my computer we used for your report.”

(All my coworkers got a good laugh on this one and he’s never called me for a security code again.)