As Helpless As A Baby
Me: “Welcome to [Airlines]. How can I help today?”
Caller: “I need to book a ticket for my husband for May 3rd, from Tampa to Grand Rapids, Michigan.”
Me: “Thanks. Would he prefer morning, afternoon, or evening flights?”
Caller: “What does that mean?”
Me: “The morning flight leaves in the morning, at 6:45 am. The afternoon flight leaves at 1:20 pm in the afternoon. The evening flight leaves at 6:25 pm.”
Caller: “Can he get there in time?”
Me: “I don’t know, ma’am. That depends on where he’s leaving from, and how far he has to drive to the airport.”
Caller: “Oh. And those are all on May 3rd?”
Me: “Yes, ma’am.”
Caller: “My doctor’s inducing my labor on May 2nd. Will he get here in time?”
Me: “I really don’t know how long your labor will last, ma’am. That’s something you should probably consult your doctor about.”
Caller: “But is May 2nd the same day?”
Me: *baffled* “The same day as…?”
Caller: “The same day as May 3rd!”
Me: “No, ma’am. May 3rd is the day after May 2nd.”
Caller: “But what if it’s 5 in the morning?”
Me: “It’s either 5 in the morning on May 2nd, or 5 in the morning on May 3rd.”
Caller: “But is it the same day?”
Me: “Maybe you should have your husband call to book his own flight, because he’ll know how long it takes to get to the airport.”
Caller: “That’s a good idea. Should he book it for May 2nd or May 3rd?”
Me: “You should probably ask your doctor first.”
Caller: “I guess. You people make it so complicated to buy a ticket!”
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