An Unsanitary Attitude

(I am a doctor at a GP. I’m rather unconventional for a doctor, with tattoos and piercings. Almost everyone is fine with it after meeting me, but it does sometimes spook some newer patients.)

Me: *walking into the lobby* “[Patient]?”

(Everyone quickly glances, but no one responds.)

Me: “I’m ready to see [Patient]?”

(Again, no one. I go back into my office and wait for a short while to see if they arrive. After 20 minutes I move on. I step out of my office and hear a woman shouting.)

Patient: “I’ve been waiting! This is my first appointment.”

Receptionist: “He didn’t call you?”

Patient: “No!”

Me: “What’s the name? I could maybe squeeze you in. I’ve had a no show.”

(The patient turns and recoils at my appearance, muttering “disgusting” under her breath.)

Receptionist: “It’s [Patient].”

Me: “Ah, you were my no show.”

Patient: *agog* “He can’t be a doctor!”

Receptionist: “He actually opened [GP].”

Patient: “But just look at him! F****** horrid! You look like a junkie! I want to see someone else!”

Elderly Patient: “Good! I guess it’s my turn, then!”

(The elderly patient makes her way past me when the other patient speaks up.)

Patient: “You aren’t serious! He’ll probably stick heroin in you or something! It’s f****** disgusting! Those stretched ears!”

Elderly Patient: “Shut up! I have lived long enough to know that the time and effort someone puts into their schooling is more important than the colours and holes they put in themselves, and if you can’t see that then I pity you. Dr. [My Name], come on. This hip is killing me.”

(The patient decided to make another appointment on a day I wasn’t working and is still with us. She is forced to see me regularly now, though, as her son has started suffering from asthma, and I’m the most experienced handling the condition. He likes to ask me lots of questions about my appearance and sometimes tries to pull on my ears when I’m not looking. His mum practically faints whenever he tries, and when finished sprints to the hand sanitiser, using so much of it she gets sticky, before sprinting out of the GP altogether.)