An Insult To Salads

, , , , , | Right | January 26, 2020

(At a small neighborhood Thai restaurant, a young coworker asks me to take over a difficult table.)

Me: “What can I get for you tonight, ma’am?”

(The customer flips the menu back and forth with frustration.)

Customer: “Where’s the American food?”

Me: “We don’t serve American food, ma’am; this is a Thai restaurant.”

(She gives me some side-eye.)

Customer: “I know that, but where’s the American food?”

Me: “Um… There’s a BBQ joint right next door… or fried chicken across the street.”

(She glares. I shrug.)

Customer: “Where’s the Japanese guy I was talking to earlier?”

Me: “Julio is busy with another customer right now.”

Customer: “I’ll have the house salad; that’s American. I want ranch dressing.”

Me: “It just comes with the peanut sauce dressing, ma’am. We don’t have ranch.”

Customer: “Okay, but put it on the side.”

(The order is placed and the food comes out. She picks out about a third of the chicken, returns it, and offers to pay for ONLY her iced tea.)

Me: “It’s on me. Have a nice night.”

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