An Alco-Hole In Your Reasoning

(My mom and I are the weird customers in this story. My mom and her partner just bought a house together, and we go to a store that specializes in wines and beers to pick out some refreshments for the house-warming party. Of note: we’ve always had a weird vocabulary, my mom almost never drinks, and I’m 16 when this takes place.)

Mom: “Hmm…” *trying to figure out what beer to get*

Employee: “How can I help you ladies today?”

Mom: “Well, we’re having a little get-together, and I’m just now realizing I have no idea what I’m doing.”

Employee: *turning to me* “And, may I ask, how old are you?”

Mom: “My daughter’s sixteen, but she’s with me.”

Me: “I’m just here in a pack-mule capacity.”

Mom: “I’ve never been big on alcohol, and I suspect she takes after her mother in that regard, but I know most of the people who are coming to our house-warming party would want a beer or a glass of wine. Can you help us?”

(The employee helped pick out some general crowd-pleasers, but kept eyeing me like she expected me to pop the lid off a bottle and start chugging it down. My step-mom ended up declaring one of the picks to be her new favorite wine!)