An Alarmingly Powerful Imagination

(I have just gotten back from a long day of hard manual labor in the Arizona sun. I am sitting in my dorm trying to relax and work off the muscle aches.)

Roommate: “Man, it’s really quiet today. Hope it stays that way.”

Me: “Yeah, I think it will, thank goodness. I’m so tired. I’m gonna take a nap.”

Roommate: “Now’s a good time. It’s never this calm in here.”

Me: “Yep. It’s not like the fire alarm’s going to go off or anything. Imagine if that happened.” *we both laugh* “I’d be SO pissed.”

(As if on cue, our horrible old screeching fire alarm goes off, making us both jump.)

Me: “Noooooo! Seriously?! Why?”

Roommate: “D*** it, [My Name]. Usually I tell people to use their imagination, but never, ever use your imagination around me!”