Always Calls When It’s Showtime

(It’s Friday. One of the biggest movies of the year has just opened and we’re operating to near-constant crowds. As a result, we can’t always answer phones, and common calls like people asking for show times cannot be addressed and must be put on hold or given the number for an automated hotline for show times and similar inquiries. The phone rings. I manage to answer it between guests on concession.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Theater]! How can I help you?”

(An elderly voice responds.)

Caller: “Yes, can I get a list of the movies you’ll have playing tomorrow and the show times for each?”

Me: “I’m terribly sorry, but we’re quite busy. I won’t be able to answer show time questions as all of our box-office registers are currently in use. If you’d like, I can either give you the number to an automated line that lists show times, or you could stay on hold and we can have someone help you when they’re available.”

Caller: “I’ll just call back.”

(The caller hangs up before I can even say “Good-bye” and I go back to my register. 15 minutes later we’re just as busy and the phone rings. I again answer it. It’s the same caller.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Theater]! How can I help you?”

Caller: “I was hoping I could get the list of movies you’ll be playing tomorrow and your show times.”

Me: “I’m sorry. We’re quite busy today. Can I put you on hold? Or give you the number to a hotline that can provide you with show times?”

Caller: *deep sigh* “I’ll just call back.”

(Less than five minutes later, the same person calls back. I see the number on the phone’s caller-ID, so I answer.)

Me: “Thank you for calling! I notice that this is the same number I’ve spoken to before. Unfortunately, we’re still quite busy and I won’t be able to provide you with the information you’re seeking at this time. May I give you the number of our automated hotline? It’ll give you the information you’re looking for.”

Caller: *shrieking* “I’LL JUST CALL BACK, THEN!”

(The caller calls back almost a dozen more times over the next hour. I stop answering, but each time I hear a coworker giving her the same spiel, specifically noting that we have an automated hotline that has the information she’s seeking. Finally, I answer the phone again.)

Me: “Thank you for calling! How can I help you?”

Caller: *furious* “Do you have a number I can call for show times?! I’m sick and ****ig tired of calling!”

Me: “Yes, we do. It’s [number].”

Caller: *screaming* “Why couldn’t you just have told me that an hour ago?!”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, I…”

(I hear a click.)

Me: “…told you. Repeatedly.”

Coworker: “Same lady? She finally take the hint?”

Me: “We can only hope.”