All Work And No Trousers

(I am tutoring a high school junior who is on the autism spectrum. This student is a good student and is usually very well behaved. He tends to talk to himself as he works and uses a few stock phrases to try to keep calm and confident. Today, he decides to try a new one.)

Me: “Okay, [Student], I am going to give you a practice test. Take your time and remember you can do it!”

(The kid begins to quietly work, but a few minutes later he starts to bolster himself.)

Student: “All right, you got this. Keep it in your pants, [Student]. Keep it in your pants.”

Me: “…”

(He’s never used this phrase before, so I let it go, thinking I misheard. Later his mom joins us and he starts again.)

Student: “Okay, it’s going good. Keep it in your pants. You got this.”

Mom: “…” *stares at me in confusion*

Me: “…” *returns Mom’s confused look*

Student: “You can do this; just keep it in your pants, [Student].”

Mom: “Um… [Student], I think you should use a different phrase.”

Student: “I should say something else?”

Me: “Yeah, [Student], try saying ‘Keep it together,’ instead. I think it is more similar to what you are going for. What you are currently saying doesn’t mean what you think it means.”

Student: “Well, what does it mean?”

Me: “Uh… you don’t need to know right now. Just focus on the test, okay?”

(The student just went back to work like nothing happened. He never used that phrase again.)

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