All Signs Point To No

(A customer pulls up and parks in a handicapped spot in front of the store.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “I’ll take a fresh-squeezed orange juice.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry sir, we just cleaned our juicer, and the chemical that we use had to dry or else it’s toxic. We won’t be able to squeeze any juice until tomorrow.”

Customer: “What the f***? This is the second time this has happened.”

Me: “Well, we clean it a half hour before we close–”

Customer: “You should put up a sign!”

Me: “Oh, um. Well, I’ll mention that to my manager–”

Customer: “PUT UP A SIGN!”

Me: “Sir, I don’t have the authority to do that, but I’ll–”

Customer: “JUST PUT UP A SIGN!”

Me: “Oh, and you’re parked in a handicapped zone.”

Customer: “THEY SHOULD–”

Me: “Yes, they have a sign up, sir.”