All Religions Are Greek To Me

(My friend and I are both Classics students, and she speaks Latin while I speak Greek. Lately, we’ve had several Evangelical ministers hanging around.)

Evangelist: “Have you found Jesus?”

Friend: “Um… I’m an atheist.”

Evangelist: *aghast, but turns to me* “What about you?”

Me: “Roman Catholic, born, raised, and educated. Gotta say, that Pope Francis is a pretty cool guy, am I right?”

Evangelist: *disgusted* “I am going to pray for your poor souls to save you from Hell.”

Me: “I’ll help!” *does the Sign of the Cross* “In Nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti, Amen. Pater Noster qui es en caelis, ho Dicaeopolis athenaios estin, dis eis en ton potamon esbaie…”

Evangelist: *throws his hands up and storms off*

Friend: “That is probably the worst attempt at Latin I have ever heard, but that was the funniest thing I’ve seen this week.”

Me: “Ouk eimi tehn polea. Yeah, it’s the also worst attempt at Greek I’ve ever heard.”

(We then got to watch the minister being chased down by campus police for going outside his assigned street corner.)